ISTANBUL—Exiled Afghan leaders declared an exhaustion emergency after the Taliban survived five years of six-month collapse predictions.
Dostum postponed his Jawzjan victory parade again, asking Ankara to extend storage on the uniforms.
Atta Noor accused Kabul of staying in power solely to deny him Balkh's customs revenue.
Amrullah Saleh insisted the Republic had not fallen, merely lost access to its own territory.
Ahmad Massoud predicted imminent collapse, as he had at every European fundraising season.
Mohaqiq requested five years of back pay for ministries he had expected to inherit.
Hekmatyar renamed his old Kabul strategy “rocket mortgage,” explaining that decades of shelling had finally become a housing expense.
Atmar proposed talks to determine why previous talks had failed to deliver the promised collapse.
Fawzia Koofi and Shukria Barakzai demanded seats in the next six-month prediction before it expired.
Washington declined to intervene. “Republic charged us $100 for what the IEA does for $5. Same results, 95% savings."
The summit unanimously predicted the Taliban would collapse within six months. A medical committee warned several delegates had already outlived three governments, two constitutions and their original life expectancies.
Organizers requested urgent American intervention, fearing that if Washington waited much longer, it would have to liberate Kabul, exhume the opposition and install Afghanistan's first government-in-waiting from the grave.