BRUSSELS—European governments announced a breakthrough in principled foreign policy after discovering the Taliban can be both an unacceptable regime and a convenient address.
“We remain absolutely opposed to the Taliban,” German Interior Minister Alexander Dobrindt said, “except in the destination field.”
Officials may condemn Kabul’s treatment of women before asking it to receive women deported from Europe. “Our principles come first,” Foreign Minister Johann Wadephul said. “The passengers board afterward.”
Taliban Foreign Minister Amir Khan Muttaqi welcomed the talks. “They do not recognize us at conferences, but they recognize our signature at arrivals.”
Kabul promised returnees would be treated according to Afghan law, a phrase Brussels accepted after confirming it contained the word “law.”
Europe will not recognize the Taliban as Afghanistan’s government, but will recognize its authority over Afghans Europe no longer recognizes as its responsibility.
“This is purely technical,” Macron explained. “The technique is deportation.”
The European Commission proposed a human-rights monitoring mechanism requiring Kabul to submit quarterly assurances that deportees had arrived alive. Further monitoring was deemed unnecessary interference in Afghan sovereignty.
Brussels declared a historic victory for European values. Taliban applauded: “For years, Europe lectured us about human rights. Now they’ve finally understood our system, get rid of the humans and the rights disappear.”